Spiritually Healthy

Last night I had a weird dream.  I often don't share my dreams on here, mostly because they can be extremely strange and sometimes violent.  This one though, struck a cord and so I'm sharing it here. In this dream I found myself surrounded by a bunch of people who were having their prayers answered. In my heart I was crying out to God, asking Him why I wasn't being heard. The response I got was along the lines of,"Are you faithful to Me?" When my eyes opened at 3:00AM this morning, I felt frustrated.  As I laid in my bed, I asked myself a question: have I been faithful to God this past week? Though I wanted to say, "Yeah, sure I have. I'm Christian, aren't I? Just being a believer is proof enough that I am faithful." I tried to reason with myself that this was the answer I needed when I knew in my deepest soul that it wasn't so.  Right now, the Lord is stretching me. Pulling me here and there; causing growth that I didn't think was needed

"For I do now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ." Galatians 1:10 Who am I trying to please? Who am I aiming to honor? Man or God?  Over the course of this year the Lord has been working in my heart and revealing areas of my life that I have not been honoring Him. He has shown me through getting a new job that I have been seeking the approval of man and not seeking to live a life that is pleasing to the Lord.  Instead of me trying to run away from something that makes me shift in my seat, I am learning (though the discipline is hard) to be content where He has placed me and to thank Him for giving me this opportunity to grow in grace, patience and faith. "Just start thanking God in advance because no matter what is about to happen, you already know that God is in charge. You are not adrift in a sea of chaos." Elisabeth Elliot  I came across this quote by one of my favorite people today w

 Job 5:7 -Yet man is born unto trouble, as the sparks fly upward. "Trouble" (H5999) - toil, that is, wearing effort; hence, worry, whether of body or mind ..."no affliction comes by chance, nor is to be attributed to second causes: It  doth not come forth of the dust,  nor  spring out of the ground,  as the grass doth,  v. 6 . It doth not come of course, at certain seasons of the year, as natural productions do, by a chain of second causes. The proportion between prosperity and adversity is not so exactly observed by Providence as that between day and night, summer and winter, but according to the will and counsel of God, when and as he thinks fit. Some read it,  Sin comes not forth out of the dust, nor   iniquity of the ground.  If men be bad, they must not lay the blame upon the soil, the climate, or the stars, but on themselves.  If thou scornest, thou alone shalt bear it.  We must not attribute our afflictions to fortune, for they are from God, nor our sins to fate,

Today I actually put my Bible down and walked away from it. Reading the Truth was a struggle for me. The book, the chapters, the content, all of it was a reminder that I am still growing as a believer; still walking the path that is set before me.  I woke up this morning and went for a short run. Pounding pavement (or sand in my case) with music blasting in my ears has always been an escape for me. Even though my doctor said I should lay off the running because of my bad knees, I did it anyway. The run was short in distance but my thoughts took me miles away from reality.  Maybe I don't often share during a hard day. I mostly share afterwards when God has revealed something to me through His word or trial. Well folks, today I'm not just on the struggle bus, I'm driving it.  This post is just a jumble of my thoughts and frustrations.